So Much Talking, So Little Listening

It's been almost a year since I've written in this blog. I couldn't bring myself to do it, and I'm a writer. I haven't been able to bring myself to do several things I love, like study (super dork alert...I love to read, study, and learn) as I had been working on my sex therapist training before March 2020. That interest and drive stopped abruptly. My focus shifted to more immediate concerns and anxieties. And so, I was patient, compassionate, and gentle with myself. I've learned over time that self-compassion is powerful and effective. It's how I treat others, and it's how I respond best, so it has become my internal voice.

But why didn't I want to write or do? I think the answer is there was so much being said, in all kinds of environments, and at times, I found that overwhelming. I wanted to listen, to contemplate, to not add to the noise (not that all of the discourse was noise).

Listening is so powerful and underrated...I find that it is what many people crave and lack in their lives. The presence of attunement...phones down, eye contact, listening intently, not to respond but to be with, "that's all". But it's not minor, it's huge! It's a gift. It creates connection. It helps us feel seen, heard, and valued. And it's how I could contribute, how I could show up, so that's what I did.

I feel ready to come out of my shell a bit, in so many ways. Slowly, gently and that's okay. My pace is a good pace for me. Everyone's pace is different. Spring is such a lovely time to come out of hibernation. Writing this felt good, not overwhelming, not tangled up. I feel ready. This mimics how many arrive at therapy...they have to be ready, the pacing needs to fit and no one-size-fits-all. Some people are "marinators", they think about what happens in session to make meaning or connect dots over time. Sometimes they need to space out appointments a bit. Others consume information much quickly. Some fall in the middle. It is all okay. It all works if we work the process. This blog serves, in one way, to help potential clients get a sense of me, how I work, how I think and process. If you'd like to chat, explore, lean in, process, create change, come out of your hibernation, or marinade a bit, reach out. I'm here to listen, to help.

About the author: Dr. Melissa Hudson, LMFT-S is a couple's therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist supervisor in the DFW area since 2012. She offices near the Shops of Legacy in West Plano, conveniently located to serve the communities of The Colony, McKinney, Allen, and Frisco. She also specializes in working with those contending with depression and anxiety as well as a wide spectrum of other psychological concerns you can learn about here. Her passion is working with couples to rekindle love, desire, and relational stability. At this time, she is taking new clients and working remotely using Telehealth. She looks forward to getting back to her office, hopefully in the summer or early fall.

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So Much Talking, So Little Listening

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